Theatre of the Absurd: The 2012 Election Campaign

By Elayne Savage, PhD

I'm offended and yes, I take it personally, by the onslaught of disrespect and incivility during this political campaign. This year bad taste seems more absurd and surreal than ever – and mean-spirited, too.

I dislike being exposed to the personal attacks, insults, bullying and condescending attitudes. I don't mean for any of these ideas to be taken as a political statement. It's mostly musings about how easy it is to feel dissed and take things personally.

Almost daily, in my various roles as a consultant, coach, psychotherapist and speaker, I hear stories about offensive, hurtful behavior by families, teachers, peers or bosses.

Almost daily, someone relates past or present experiences of ridicule, sneering, scorning, derisive laughter, undermining, interrupting, or browbeating.

Almost daily, I hear how these experiences of rejecting words, or tones of voice or facial expressions can have long-term effects.

So witnessing this deluge of dissing during this campaign is especially disturbing to me.

The 'Diss List'

I call it the 'Diss List.' A collection of rejection words beginning with "dis,"inferring some form of disrespect, and usually resulting in taking things personally. There are dozens of diss words – here are a few examples:
disrespected,  dismissed, disdained, discounted, disregarded, discarded, dispensable, disconnected, disbelieved,  disposable, disowned, disapproved of, disenfranchised, dishonored or disappointed in.

Are there some words on this list that describe your perception of what has been going on during the presidential and vice-presidential  debates and ad campaigns? Do you have your own words or impressions to add? I'd love to hear them.

Theatre of the Absurd

To me, each election year becomes more and more like Theatre of the Absurd. Absurdism involves portraying situations where the characters raise questions but don't provide answers, where there is no assumption of purpose, and where there is no logic to motivations, creating an atmosphere of ridiculousness.

   – I find it surreal to be repeatedly exposed to misrepresentations and deceptions. Being lied to is a sure-fire way for me to take things personally. 

  – I have a hard time watching denigrating facial expressions, smirks, eye-rolling, bullying and other dismissive attitudes.

  – I find certain behaviors especially crazy-making: deflections, denials, projections, mystification and obfuscation. 

Evasions, Deflections and Distractions

I know some politicians become skilled at deflecting questions. But do they realize how invalidating and insulting to intelligence this can be?

Some of us grew up in families where you ask a question but never get a straight answer. There is no definition. The subject gets changed, the issue gets skirted, and we are left feeling rejected, dismissed and ignored.

Denial and Mystification

Repeated denial by candidates of their previous statements and actions is about as surreal as it gets It feels like they are telling me I didn't see it or I didn't hear it. – that I can't trust my own ears or eyes.

Perhaps some of you grew up with your experience and feelings being denied as well: "That didn't happen." "You must have made it up." "I didn't say that." "You really didn't have a nightmare – you're imagining it."

Can you see how we might begin to mistrust our own perceptions?

Scottish psychiatrist, R.D. Laing calls this 'mystification' . . . an attempt to "befuddle, cloud, obscure, mask" what is really going on.

Interestingly, Laing's article begins with: "You can fool some of the people some of the time . . ."

I don't like being fooled. It brings back uncomfortable childhood memories of how rejecting it is to have perceptions and feelings invalidated.

Obfuscation "Can You Guess the Hidden Meaning?"

Connected to mystification is obfuscation – the concealment of meaning in communication, making it ambiguous, confusing and hard to interpret.

A common way of doing this is by using jargon – a kind of secret language or code words that only a select group of people understand where the hidden meanings are incomprehensible to outsiders. Sometimes it feels like something like this might be happening during the ads or the debates. Or is it just my imagination?

Psychological Projections – Spreading the Garbage Around

Some political accusations seem to be more about the person making them then they are about the person or group on the receiving end.

The tendency to see certain traits in another person or group when you cannot acknowledge them in yourself is called psychological projection.

Here's how it works: When we find traits, behaviors, ideas or feelings unacceptable in someone else, it is usually because these are actually blind spots for us. We need to disown and submerge them. These traits are sometimes called our 'shadow side.'

If they do start to pop up, they make us really nervous, so we try to protect ourselves. In other words, to rid ourselves of this anxiety, we may unconsciously project these unacceptable parts of ourselves onto other folks. We may accuse them of the same types of behaviors that we find incompatible with how we want or need to see ourselves.

(Do you remember the old Saturday Night Live joke about finger pointing? "When someone is pointing their finger at you, remind yourself that three fingers are pointing right back at the person pointing.")

Have you noticed evidence of projection in the campaigning? Is it as perplexing for you as it is for me when accusations are flung around in this way?

Really Bad Taste

During the Vice-presidential debate, something touched me in a very personal way.

I couldn't believe I was hearing one candidate telling a car crash story in the presence of another candidate whose wife and young daughter had died  in a car crash. (Maybe I'm just being too sensitive after suffering through countless plane crash stories for so many years.) I find it surreal that this tasteless behavior would occur in the debate.

And I found Joe Biden's laughter and demeaning facial expressions to be tasteless and excessive.
 
The Absurdity of It All

Watching the ads and debates is like watching Theatre of the Absurd. Think of Beckett's 'Waiting for Godot.' Characters Vladimir and Estragon  repeatedly exclaim about taking action – but they do nothing. Much like many of our elected politicians.

Act I
Estragon: Well, shall we go?
Vladimir: Yes, let's (they don't move)

And again at the end of Act II:
Vladimir: Well? Shall we go/
Estragon: Yes, let's go. (They do not move)

Sound familiar?

I'd love to hear your ideas and comments . . .
elayne@QueenofRejection.com


© Elayne Savage, PhD

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Comments

8 responses to “Theatre of the Absurd: The 2012 Election Campaign”

  1. Elaine Boston

    Thanks for your interesting blog post about the political debates.
    I think society has come to value style over substance.
    Drama IS the name of the “game.” It’s almost as though the politics is scripted to be as outrageous as possible.
    In the second presidential debate, both candidates were like actors conveying dominance by their body language to sway public sentiment.
    People claim they don’t like all the negativity in the political debates, but yet look at how many watch the reality shows that exhibit the worst of human behavior. 
    I think people are losing the ability to think for themselves. I have noticed that commercials on TV use some of the same language, phrases or points that I’ve heard politicians use. The thought occurs to me that the same public relations firms that do commercials are probably involved in politics, too.
    Although both sides accuse the Press of being biased, the press is a player in the the game of obfuscation. The Press no longer does true investigative work. Instead it is about “entertainment over substance.”

  2. Thanks, Elaine for your response to the blog.
    I really like how you connected the drama of TV reality shows to present-day politics.

  3. Elaine Boston

    The challenge for people like me is how to be engaged in becoming a more informed, knowledgeable citizen, without becoming enmeshed in the negativity and drama of the mass media.
    There are very few examples in the public arena of people being calm and rational when discussing their political views.
    When people disdain the public negativity and spectacle they just tune everything out. But that is not a good option if we want our democracy to survive.
    I think that would be a interesting blog topic to discuss. 
    Elaine Boston

  4. Susan Ward

    Wow, Elayne! I can really relate to the campaign absurdities!  My favorite word for the ‘diss’s’ is invalidation, which I saw in your article.
    Distraction and deception are discouraging, and they can lead to despair! No wonder we get in a funk as election time draws near. 
    I used to think that the invalidation was confusing because I took it personally. But no more! I found a new word just this morning: “Perplexing.” 
    “Perplexing” is like confused, only without the personal stigma of shame or inadequacy. Perplexing things don’t make sense, but only because I don’t have all the facts in the right order to figure the puzzle out yet. There is still hope that I will not stay perplexed. 
    On the other hand, confusion as a child (and, by default, on into adulthood)  meant that there was something wrong with me because I should have, ought to have known something. 
    So now when I am perplexed by those politicians, I don’t take it personally because I know that somewhere in their minds, they have a logic I don’t understand yet, and that is OK with me! What is clear to me now is: it is not so important who you vote for, as much as who you are praying for. Blessings.
    Susan Ward

  5. You are correct! We are treated badly, we need to start a campaign..Manners, manners, social skills etc….
    However can we be a little more positive ?

  6. Audrey Fain

    Dear wise Elayne,
     
    Very good observations!
    Too bad people are inured to rudeness and disparaging remarks. They are so accustomed to listening to judgemental actions that they can no longer even register feelings.  

  7. Gail Glassberg

    I couldn’t agree with you more. The incivility has gotten so bad that I don’t even want to turn on the TV until election night.

  8. Well you asked,so here we go.
    Yes I think civility is sorely lacking in politics now, and I think most of it comes from the right.
    I’m 99 percent Democrat. There might be a Republican here and there that I would vote for – John McCain and George H. Bush were acceptable. Eisenhower did a good job warning of the dangers of Military/Industrial complex, which we need to be ever vigilant about.
    I simply do not see how people like Mitt Romney and George W. Bush can have any concept of what it feels like to be middle class or poor in this country. However, they do a good job of making people feel that some of the rich man’s money is going to trickle down to them and they too will become rich.
    Do you remember the song ” Fortunate Son” by Credence Clearwater Revival? If ever a song implicates George W.Bush, Mitt Romney, Dan Quayle and others, it is this one.
    I live in a conservative state and I have some friends who have the same political leanings as I do. However, I am frequently exposed to political opinions of my right-leaning friends – at group functions, on FB or in e-mails. I’m told that if I don’t agree with them, I am godless, a communist, a socialist, or unpatriotic. I never respond to their rants.
    I do not want confrontation with friends, but on the other hand, I want desperately to let them know that I strongly disagree without running the risk of being labeled and losing friendships.
    You were alluding to smirking and rolling of eyes that Joe Biden did. Is that rude? Why yes, of course it is. But it is no more rude than what those of us who are more liberal in our politics have been subjected to for years from those on the right. We’re sick of it and fighting back.
    I was glad to see the president become more assertive in the last debate. Democrats have been too nice and agreeable. Intellect, logic and niceness do not work.

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Elayne Savage is the author of ground-breaking relationship books published in 9 languages.


To find out more about Elayne’s speaking programs, coaching and consultation services visit www.QueenofRejection.com or call 510-540-6230 if you or your group can benefit. 

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Wouldn’t it be great to not be so sensitive to words, looks, or tones of voice? This thoughtful, good-humored book explores the many forms of rejection and how to overcome the fear of it. Learn dependable tools for stepping back from these overwhelming feelings.

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Breathing Room: Creating Space to Be a Couple

Expectations and disappointments, style differences, and hidden agendas lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Before you know it, anger and resentment build up, taking up all the space. You’ll learn how to make room for the respect and connection you hope for.