Elayne Savage, PhD – Page 3 – Tips from the Queen of Rejection®

CHOOSING KINDNESS

Dec 31, 2023

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As a way of finding some balance for myself in a chaotic and disturbing world I find my self seeking exalmples of kindness.. Seems there has been so much unkindness, and even mean-spiritedness and even hostility and even retaliation out there the experience of kindness is a welcome relief.

Seeking Respect in a Dissing Kind of World

Nov 30, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Respect is the backbone of relationships — personal, workplace, and as we see now, political. Lately I’m noticing that respect has become frayed and tattered and torn and sometimes practically non-existent. Misunderstandings and hurt feelings and anger and resentment seem to be filling the space and there is barely room for connection.

A Very Scary Protest

Oct 31, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

It’s stunning to me how quickly a recent scary situation can bring up long-ago childhood fearful memories.

When Apologies are Non-apologies

Sep 30, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Apologies are difficult so many of us make a non-apology – full of justifications, excuses and rationalizations for very unclassy, hurtful, denigrating, and often intentionally mean-for-meanness-sake behavior.

The Case of the Missing Apology

Aug 31, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Lately lots of political name-calling and finger-pointing and blaming and shaming. Folks taking things personally and retaliating by lashing out. But have you noticed apologies seem to be missing – along with stepping up and taking responsibility for often outrageous behavior.

The Big-time Influence of Personal Boundaries

Jul 31, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Personal boundary confusion is a challenge for many of us, especially if we grew up in a family where there was a lack of clear boundaries often leading to disrespect and shame. Boundary confusion can be especially problematic in the workplace.

The Supreme Court’s Decision to Impede Young Minds

Jun 30, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

The Supreme Court’s decision to effectively end race-conscious admissions is especially having an effect on me. Scary memories of intimidation by the Klan with the integration of the University of Alabama.

Trying to Feel Safe but Old Fears Keep Assaulting Me

Apr 30, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

I like to think of myself as pretty fearless and gutsy but not so much with all the news of smash-and-grabs, assaults and shootings. My PTSD-like visceral response comes from old fears when I was a Child Protective Social Worker in San Francisco many years ago.

Wearing Victimhood As a Badge of Honor

Mar 31, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Donald Trump is talented at using his own painful feelings of victimhood to bond with the public. When we feel inadequate we might puff ourselves up to bully size. He learned how to be an expert bulliy from being bullied by his father .

In the Spirit of Teamwork

Feb 28, 2023

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Elayne Savage, PhD

Hakeem Jefferies and Keven McCarthy are teaming up to create a bipartisan task force to ensure due process on House committee removal. Moving forward from the past two years of punishing legislators by removing them from committee assignments. Teamwork usually includes respect — sure hope so.

Author: Elayne Savage, PhD